This 'Friends' Lego Set Is Very Wrong

This week, Gizmodo UK wrote about a Friends-themed Lego set, which comes complete with a plastic orange couch, teeny coffee cups, and thumb-sized Monicas, Rosses, Chandlers, Phoebes and Rachels. The outlet is very into this new plaything, noting it had them "more excited than Joey at Thanksgiving." But I have been marathoning Friends for the last few months, and I AM HERE TO TELL YOU this set is inaccurate.

The "unofficial" set (so "unofficial" it's called B*U*D*D*I*E*S and not F*R*I*E*N*D*S) is a collaboration between a company called Minifigs and Lego builder Tom Young, and despite the Gizmodo assertion that Friends superfans will be blown away by the "incredible" amount of detail in the set, I would argue that the detail is in fact FALSE and MISLEADING. Here is the Minifigs version of Central Perk, dubbed "Coffee Place" here for apparent copyright reasons:

I have spent a lot of time inside Central Perk, emotionally, and there are some major errors. For instance, the real Central Perk features a number of neon signs, and this Lego Central Perk has zero. There is not nearly enough artwork on the walls, the comfy chair by the couch is WHITE instead of GREEN, the blackboard sign is too small, and the rug is checkered instead of Persian print. DO YOU SEE HOW WRONG THIS IS?

Now, moving onto the Friends figurines themselves. I have some concerns. Here is Monica:

Monica is dressed in the outfit she wore in the Season 5 episode "The One with All The Thanksgivings,"—you know this, because she is holding the "recipe" for her perfect turkey. This recipe is wildly incorrect, as it lists "Place on head" as a step. This is a reference to a famous scene in the episode where Joey puts the turkey on his head, but it is not something Monica would have approved of, as she was horrified when Joey ruined her turkey. Another important detail here is that Monica was not wearing a crop top in the scene, but her Lego version is. Also, Monica has blue eyes. It is her most striking feature.

Up next, Chandler:

I suppose this is fine.

Here's Phoebe:

I suppose this is also fine.

Now here's Joey:

This Joey figurine has blue lips, a reference to the Japanese Ichiban "lipstick for men" commercial he starred in in Season 10. But in that commercial, he's wearing a suit—his figurine, meanwhile, is casually dressed. WRONG.

Here's Ross:

This Ross figurine is holding the famed Rachel/Julie list from Season 2, but his hair is much too high to represent the Ross of that period. Indeed, Season 2 Ross had shorter, more shellacked hair, and it wasn't until later that they allowed David Schwimmer to grow a small tower atop his head. Also, this two-sided Ross comes a head featuring the cat face Rachel drew on him in Vegas, and that wasn't until Season 5, long after the Rachel/Julie situation had been resolved.

And here, my friends, is the pièce de résistance—I present to you a Lego that is allegedly Rachel Green:

OH GOD WHERE TO BEGIN. First of all, Rachel Green's hair is not BRIGHT YELLOW, it is honey-blonde. HONEY. BLONDE. Second, the only time Rachel's hair (which became a pop culture moment on its own) was that short was in Season 7, and by then she was a Merchandising Manager at Ralph Lauren, NOT a "Fashion Buyer." In that vein, the Lego also comes with a Rachel face featuring the mustache and beard Ross drew on her in Vegas in Season 5 which, again, was NOT when she had that haircut. Also, that pantsuit is a goddamn travesty and Rachel would NEVER WEAR IT.

So, folks, while you're welcome to purchase this Friends Lego set, know that what you're getting is not an accurate miniature version of the famed '90s sitcom, but a tiny plastic sham. You've been warned by an expert. Purchase at your own risk.